(Unlike the Matthew G. Gerber, Esq. I am going to do my list in descending order because it is the way all these lists are arranged. That is the custom Gerbs stop being subversive)
10. Rudy is the Favorite
It may be hard to remember, due to the human gift of hindsight, that for the majority of the Republican Primary former New York City Mayor and “America’s Mayor” Rudy Giuliani was the unquestioned frontrunner. Poll after poll showed that the GOP masses were leaning toward Rudy. The New York City talking sect was awash in the gossip of a Rudy v. Hillary presidential contest. But then people started to vote and the Rudy ruse was quickly exposed. It turns out that a party based on social conservatism did not really want to be represented by a former big city mayor from the liberal northeast who was pro-choice, pro-gay rights, and pro-gun regulation.
Ultimately, Rudy’s decision to skip the first three primaries in Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina and rely solely on winning Florida, which he resoundingly lost, doomed him and proved to be the worst political strategy since Herbert Hoover thought a balanced budget was a good idea during a depression.
9. Big Time Democratic Sex-Scandals
In 2007, John Edwards and Elliot Spitzer were considered leading lights in the Democratic Party. Both were young, famous and intelligent lawyers hell-bent on reform who spoke of populism and equality. In 2008, both became national jokes when they allowed hormones to dictate behavior.
Spitzer got caught having an affair with a high-end prostitute. The sordid details became instant media fodder; everybody marveled as it was revealed that he spent extra to have intercourse without a condom, not a smart move when biblically bedding a call girl. Spitzer was forced to resign and faced the harshest criminal laws in the union for frequenting a prostitute; laws that he ironically championed and passed as governor.
John Edwards ran for President (again) as a populist role model whose character was beyond reproach, even if many thought he was overtly vain. After dropping out of the primaries he continued to position himself for a roll in the next democratic administration, until this summer when the National Inquirer revealed that he had been having an affair with a former campaign worker, Reille Hunter, while his wife was dealing with an incurable form of cancer. Speculation swirled that Edwards had sired an illegitimate child with Hunter and the Inquirer published photos of a private meeting between the two in a Los Angeles hotel room and his political career was effectively over. But at least his hair still looked fantastic.
8. Jeremiah Wright
“God Damn America!” “These chickens are coming home to roost!”
After sailing above the poisonous and noxious history of race in America for over a year, Barack Obama suddenly had a racial problem. What did the hate-filled words of Obama’s pastor reveal about Obama’s own personal beliefs? Did he also hate America? How could he have sat in the pews for two decades and listen to this man?
Jeremiah Wright’s sermons, released as DVD’s and easily found on Youtube, exemplified the old Martin Luther King Jr. maxim that America is most segregated on Sundays. Fox News ran constant coverage, Hillary Clinton tried to use the issue to demonstrate that Obama was a radical and out of step with mainstream America. Sarah Palin brought it up during the general election, although McCain refused to touch it, and Sean Hannity is still trying to say that Wright’s tirades means Obama is a Manchurian Candidate destined to destroy the fabric of the republic.
Ultimately Obama was forced to address the issue head-on, giving his powerful “Perfecting the Union” speech in Philadelphia, which addressed the legacy of discontent- for blacks and whites alike- stemming from America’s original sin. The speech, the best American political speech in a generation, quelled the storm and opened up an earnest dialogue throughout the country and demonstrated that Obama was neither a radical nor an Uncle Tom.
7. General David Petraeus wins a war
The most under reported story of the year was the plainly obvious fact that David Petraeus has won an un-winnable war. When “the surge” was announced it was met with immediate detraction. Liberals and conservatives both decried the decision and many believed we were placing too much trust and power in the hands of an unproven leader. Undeterred, Petraeus changed the mission of our troops; focused on stationing soldiers directly within the communities they were attempting to protect, instead of conducting hit and run operations then retreating back into well-guarded fortresses. Petraeus was also a shrewd power broker, meeting with resistant regional elements and convincing them to align with America instead of Al-Qaeda- a move that lead to the “Anbar Awakening” and various other tribal groups that would be funded and armed by America in exchange for ridding their areas of unsavory elements. This set the stage for the Iraqi government to consolidate power, gain legitimacy by delivering services to the population, and offered Prime Minister Nuri Al-Maliki the political capital to draft consensus legislation for regional elections and a security agreement with America that will remove combat forces in the near future.
No matter what one thinks of the war in Iraq, and I for one have long been a vocal critic of the decision to preemptively invade a country that had no weapons of mass destruction and nothing to do with 9/11, Petraeus took over an untenable situation and greatly improved the lives of Iraqis and US combat troops. Although the current peace is “fragile and reversible”, Petraeus has given both Iraqis and Americans the opportunity for long-term success, a feat unimaginable in the summer of 2006. Let us pray that he has similar success leading the war in Afghanistan from his new post at Central Command.
6. Governor Rob Blagojevich is an Idiot
How do you knock the wind out of Americans feeling great about our democratic process after a historic election? How about trying to sell the President-Elect’s Senate seat to the highest bidder while every news outlet has several reporters in your hometown covering the Obama transition?
The fact that a Governor of Illinois, who had a 13% approval rating before this scandal, was determined to use his power of appointment to line his own pockets is absurd in itself, but couple it with the fact that he knew he was under investigation for numerous other ethical lapses and still spoke freely and crudely about breaking the law and betraying the public trust, turns this story into an epic tale of sublime corruption harkening back to Tammany Hall NYC at the turn of the last century.
Blagojevich called Obama a “motherfucker” and stated, “fuck him” on tape because Obama wouldn’t play ball. He attempted to extort the Chicago Cubs, the Chicago Tribune, and a local Children’s Hospital for campaign donations. He was deluded enough to think about appointing himself to the Senate and he firmly believed that he was a contender for the Presidency in 2016. He referred to his favorite Paul Mitchell comb as “the football.”
Governor Blagojevich, thank you for reminding all Americans that change and hope may be realized, but it is usually only for a short and fleeting moment because greed and selfishness will always be a more powerful human impulse.
5. Hillary Clinton will not go away
Any What Gloom reader knows that I am no fan of H-Rod Clinton, but that woman’s resilience is remarkable. She was everywhere this year, from SNL to Meet the Press, from drinking shots with hardhat workers to wearing gowns at official events. This former first lady waged a 50 state battle (plus Guam and Puerto Rico) against Barack Obama that will be discussed forever. Hillary inspired millions of women and finally stepped out of the long shadow cast by her more politically gifted husband, but like a heroine in a Shakespearean tragedy, she was ultimately defeated by a combination of fate and circumstance. Bush’s legacy left America desperate for substantial change and she was never able to overcome our collective and unconscious desire to move past the Clinton/Bush era, which was marred by excessive partisanship, no matter how hard she stood and fought.
Hillary began 2008 as the clear-cut favorite for the Democratic nomination; she had the money, the better political machine and stronger connections. But she got out organized at the Iowa Caucus, cried before the New Hampshire primary and won an upset there before getting routed in South Carolina after being accused of race-baiting. She spilt the “Super Tuesday” primaries with Obama, but was forced to lend her broke campaign 11 million dollars right before losing a dozen primaries in a row. Hillary hung on winning Pennsylvania and an array of “rust belt states,” before getting rocked in North Carolina. She ended with less votes and delegates than Obama, but refused to give up until the Democratic Party had an emergency meeting and she was allowed to make a grand speech (18 million cracks in the highest glass ceiling). Eventually she endorsed Obama, campaigned aggressively for him and was awarded the position of Secretary of State upon his victory. That is one hell of year.
4. Sarah Palin
She came out of nowhere and immediately polarized a nation. Sarah Palin, the self described “hockey mom” who less than two years ago was the mayor of a town that is about the size of my old high school, busted onto the national stage as John McCain’s VP selection wielding butchered English, unintelligible colloquial phrases and overt conservative religiosity. The conservative base loved her, liberals hated her, the media stalked her, and most Americans could not believe that this woman could potentially be president one day.
The nomination of Sarah Palin was a desperate attempt by the McCain campaign to reignite the culture wars and divide America. Unfortunately the nation was in no mood for a debate on social values as the stock market plummeted and our banks were being nationalized. Over the course of the campaign it became clear that Palin was in no way ready to lead our nation, thanks to Kate Couric. Her foreign policy experience could be defined only as complete ignorance (“I can see Russia from my house”). Her political rallies represented everything ugly and divisive in our body politic at a time when the vast majority of our country wanted a moment of national reconciliation.
People would often ask me if I thought she was qualified to become President, and I would respond that she is older than 35 and born in America, thus she is qualified because who am I to question the constitution, but I would also add, she obviously has no intellectual curiosity or capacity and it seems as though she would be over her head running a fruit stand, let alone the free world.
In the end. Palin alienated every moderate and independent in America and helped seal John McCain’s defeat. Many conservatives still think that Palin is there party’s future, but she is so closely linked to incompetence that she is destined to be marginalized unless, of course, conservatives feel like resoundingly losing another national election.
3. The Economy Explodes
Who knew that giving strawberry pickers who make 14 grand a year a home loan for $750,000 with no down payment or monthly payments for two years would backfire?
It began with Bear Sterns going down in March, then it was Fannie and Freddie, Lehman, AIG, Citi Group and Detroit; in 2008 the economy collapsed upon itself like a supernova falling into a black hole. The Dow Jones plummeted nearly 50%. Major industries shed jobs, the government was forced to run a massive deficit or risk a run on the banks and home foreclosure affected nearly 1 of 10 households.
Over the past year Americans watched as Republicans- the party of small government- nationalized more financial institutions than FDR. The collapse of the financial system did more than anything to help Barack Obama get elected and it marked the end of an era based on supply side economics, tax cuts for the wealthy, and deregulation; the end of an era of cowboy capitalism dictated by overt greed that was tacitly approved by a narrowly interested government. Under W. the Republican orthodoxy of deregulation and no oversight reached its ridiculous extreme resulting in the leveraging of America’s future for the sake of quarterly bottom lines for corporations.
Everybody wanted something for nothing and now the reckoning is upon us. We have experienced the first “economic boom” in history that did not increase the median wage or add a significant amount of jobs; we saw that the complex global security instruments that were supposed to spread risk so nobody could get hurt backfire, hurting everyone. We sat by and watched as rating agencies switched bond ratings overnight making a lot of valuable assets worthless.
America is in the mist of the greatest economic downturn since the Great Depression. We now have a deepening credit crisis despite the fact that Congress has given our banks $700 billion to unclog the logjam. Unemployment will continue to increase and anxiety will continue to spread meaning this will probably continue to be a top story in 2009.
2. The Swing States Swing Left
During the previous two election cycles, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Florida were the three toss up states that would decide the election. In 2008 the electoral map completely changed. Obama made it a strategic goal to expand the map and challenge McCain in places that were long considered safe for any Republican candidate. Drawing on the organization that he was forced to coordinate to beat Hillary in the epic primary battle and the vast sums of money he had raised via the internet, Obama announced that he would go places Democrats never go: Indiana, Nevada and North Carolina.
So for the better part of the last year many Americans spent hours agonizing over the electoral map, asking themselves about the prospects of rust belt voters casting a ballot for a black man or if the Old Dominion had really changed enough to allow for an Obama victory.
In the end, the swing states went for Obama because the economy collapsed, Palin alienated moderates, and the Republican brand had been reduced to “dog food” according to one Republican elected official. But there was something unexplainable and magical watching Obama roll up victories in Florida, Ohio, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Virginia, Indiana, New Mexico, and Colorado. The swing states went left because Obama made the effort and they were receptive to his message after so much alienation and failure and by winning these states he proved Woody Allen’s observation right, “90% of success in life is showing up.”
1. Barack Obama wins the 2008 Presidential Election
This was an obvious choice that needs no explanation, especially for everyone that witnessed the events of November 4th and was awed by the transformative power of our democratic experiment called The United States of America.
2 Comments
December 23, 2008 at 8:21 pm
please refer to my list, and item #10 where I state “i love making lists but hate ranking things because its so arbitrary”. Thus any order to my list would have been a contradiction of what I wrote. I merely included numbers for the convenience of our readers.
March 28, 2009 at 3:31 am
Good info!